fly away from here

stressed.

So I got my rings back from the casting place today, and it cost a hell lot more than what I estimated. And when I did the estimate, I sort of did an over estimation that was over my budget. So bye bye shopping.. bye bye food.. bye bye life..

And I need to set up my display for the exhbition, final year show thing, on Tuesday and Wednesday. And a few days after that I need to sumbit all the other work for assesment. And I have a shit load to do. Way too much. For this final major project, the tutors had to give us a predicted grade when we first started on it. I got predicted a 'distinction' grade for it. And I know I deserve that grade. As in, I know I have what it takes to get a distinction. And especially how much the damn pieces are costing me, I bloody hell get a distinction. And this is what I realised whilst doing art for alvls - for all the time and effort that you put into art, anything less than the highest grade possible, you would have just wasted your time. So I need this damn distinction. But there's just way too much to do way too soon. And I will get it all done in the end. But bloody hell, I'm stressed out.

And I just realised I'm currently in the same position with this thing that I was in Feb. And again in April. And I was never in such positions in my whole life. It was usually the other way round. Maybe it's karma or some shit. But after just now, I'm wondering if I should put myself through it again..

And I'm still sick. it's been like what? 3 freaking weeks. And my flu is still here. What the hell.

[just took a very long break.. but still sighs]

And I had this ring idea.. well it was one of my initial ideas for a previous project but my tutor really liked it. The project was about 'marking the moment'. and me being me.. I wanted to work around a depressing memory. Like a shit point in your life, and that jewellery piece to remind you of it and to not go back to it. So one of my initial ideas was to create a ring that's made out of soap.. and long story short.. like the dirt in your hands is the bad memory and you wash it away? and after a while the soap ring disappears with the washing.. like the way memory sort of fades after a while?

Well my tutor wanted me to do a video presentation of it for the end of year show. And I really wanted to 'cause it was the only project he selected from our earlier projects to be put in the show. But one thing led to another and I just don't have time do a really good video of it. And I'd hate doing half-ass work when it comes to art.. i rather not do it all so yea.. But damn it..

I'm too damn stressed out and I just want someone to lean on.

Well maybe that or ice-cream.

[and i know i used 'and' a lot in the post.. but i'm too tired to care right now.. hell it's almost 4 am and i'm going back to work now.. -.-]

posted by -xin` @ 03:53